Stuck in a rut? Simple ways to start moving forward

You may have started 2019 with good intentions and New Year’s resolutions. However, many of us fail to achieve our plans because life has a habit of getting in the way. None of us can control the things that happen to us, but there is always a way to move forward and past any obstacles that are causing you to stay stuck in that rut.

You’ve probably heard the term ‘goals’ being used in relation to different forms of coaching, but what do we actually mean by this? Setting a goal is the first step towards moving forward with your life. Your goal is wholly personal to you; it might relate to a relationship, your family, career or your business. Goals help you to achieve your future plans – for example, you might want to retire early, or you might be looking for a better work-life balance, so you can spend more time with family. Sometimes when we look at the steps we need to achieve what we really want out of life, it can feel very daunting.

Where are you now?

If you think of life as a journey, consider your current destination. Where is your life taking you right now? Are you on track to get all the things you want out of life? This could apply to relationships, your career, health, lifestyle, or a family situation. If we carry on doing the same things we have done before, and we are not within reach of where we want to be, then we need to change things. Write down everything you are doing now and everything you want to achieve in the future, so you can start planning how you can realise these things.

“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

Where do you want to be?

Create a vision of your future life – forget any restraints for a moment. In an ideal world, where do you want to be in say 5, 10, 15 years’ time? If money, work or family constraints did not pose any issues, what would you need to do to get to where you want to be? Consider everything you would like to achieve, no matter how out of reach these things might seem.

“Reach for the stars.”
Christa McAuliffe

Most of the time, there is always a way to get to where you want to be. Usually, people find themselves stuck in the same rut with difficult obstacles to overcome. Achieving your vision – or dream – will involve some level of sacrifice and a great deal of compromise. However, unless you fully explore what it will actually take to achieve your vision, you will never know whether you had a chance to make it real. There may be practical ways you have not previously considered that will enable you to move forward.

Remember that sometimes, in reality, our ‘dreams’ do not quite hold up when we have spent time researching them. You may just discover your potential dream life isn’t quite as good as how you initially thought it would be. The grass can seem much greener on the other side. In fact, you might decide on an entirely different vision altogether, which could make you even happier. Therefore, it is important to create a practical, achievable visionthat will reward you with the things that really matter in life.

What do you need to do to get there?

Once you have your vision, you need to start creating your ‘life plan’, so you can set achievable goals to help you get to where you want to be. Here are a few brief examples of common goals:

  • I enjoy my career and am looking for a job promotion OR I don’t like my job and want a change of career. Your goal might be to achieve a certain level of education or training to help you get that all-important promotion or a career change.
  • I want to move my family into a bigger and better home. Your goal might be to earn more money, so you can afford a larger house; this may need to be broken down into a set of goals relating to getting a promotion, changing career or starting a new business. As above, you may need to set further goals to help you achieve your work-related goal, i.e. education and training.
  • I want to get fit and lead a healthier lifestyle. Your goal might be to eat more healthily, start exercising, stop smoking, drink less alcohol, etc. You may find that you need further help to achieve your goals – for example, therapy sessions to help you stop smoking or to help you change your relationship with food. Sometimes we all need a little help when it comes to reaching our goals.

The above goals are simplified for the purpose of this article, but once you have worked out what you want and what you need to do, you can then start working on a practical life plan to help you get there.

However, many people feel overwhelmed when it comes to making important life changes, and some obstacles may seem almost impossible to overcome. This is the reason why our clients benefit from our life coaching services.

 “I sought coaching after having a heart attack. The senior nurse who looked after me while I was in hospital suggested coaching as part of my rehabilitation. He was concerned that too many of his patients were unable to maintain a healthier lifestyle after surgery and treatment, and that coaching could prevent people relapsing through encouragement and setting clear goals. Mark and I worked in many different ways, but one coaching activity that we called The Acting Out Exercise
was the most effective for me.

I had been ignorant of what I had been doing to my body, but after doing this exercise a few times there was no escaping the damage I had been doing to myself. The beauty of the exercise is the start, middle and end aspect of it. You start greedy and end happy.”
Mr W

Move forward by having the right conversation

Led by a professional, Accredited Coach with a background in psychology, you will be given the time and space to make important decisions in a non-judgemental setting. We will help you set achievable goals to create real change, always with your best interests at heart.

If you’re struggling to move forward or overcome your obstacles or feel stuck in a rut, please get in touch.