Self-sabotage: getting in your own way

Along with every other living thing on planet earth, the aim of every human being is to ‘thrive and survive’. Surviving is when we cope with and come through difficult times; thriving is when we flourish, prosper and grow. Understood in this way, self-sabotage is anything that someone does that hinders their ability to thrive and survive. Although seemingly counter-intuitive, self-sabotage is both very common and also very easy do engage in. In this post we take a look at this all-too-human of traits.

Self-esteem: because you are worth it

The ability to value ourselves, to possess good levels of self-esteem, is essential for positive mental health and wellbeing, for Personal and Professional Development. And yet many people find it hard to acknowledge their own value. Despite the well-known negative impacts of low self-esteem, why do some people appear to settle for these outcomes when faced with the alternative: increasing their self-esteem? Why do some people find it difficult to say ‘Who I am and what I do is important’? In this article, we share some thoughts on what it means to value ourselves.

Burnout: understanding, spotting and avoiding

Burn out is a state of mental and physical exhaustion that can follow a lengthy period of personal and/or professional commitment that is unsustainable. It is the logical endpoint of a life out of control. Characteristics of burnout include:

– cognitive disruption
– depression
– severe fatigue
– social withdrawal
– impaired decision making

Anyone who has experienced burnout will tell you it is far more than just being stressed. A serious mental health issue, burnout has received a lot of attention recently in the media even if, it isn’t a new phenomenon. In this post, I offer my take on this contemporary subject.

Emotional Eating During Difficult Times

Much has been written about the impact of COVID-19 on our physical and mental health. And interestingly, the latest research from the COVID symptom study app, found that lockdown has negatively influenced our eating habits. According to the study, almost a third (29%) of us have gained weight since March. Namely, because more of us are living sedentary lifestyles, drinking more alcohol and indulging in a less healthy diet. It’s no coincidence that the UK government unveiled a new obesity strategy in the middle of lockdown this year, stating that 63% of UK adults are overweight or obese. The nation is being asked to get fit, healthy and to help protect itself and the NHS by losing weight.

If any of this resonates, read on.

Overcoming difficulties: conversations in time

Human beings exist in time. It defines who we are and how we organise our lives. So when someone goes for coaching or therapy, time always features prominently. From the time someone commits to coaching or therapy, to how they use the language of time to articulate their difficulties and challenges, time is ever-present. In this article, I look at overcoming the relationship between time, coaching and therapy.

7 ways to think about challenge

There isn’t a living thing on the planet that isn’t engaged in making the best of being alive. Being alive is a challenge, and to do it well human beings need to both thrive and survive. Fairly or unfairly, evolution has determined that achieving the optimum state of thriving and surviving requires continual investment.

The good news is that the human race possesses the innate determination to help us rise to the challenge. We know how to thrive and survive in almost any circumstances. All we have to do is to make that knowledge work for us.

Self-awareness: Triangle of Possibility (video)

“How the hell did I end up here?”

How many people have said this to themselves when, in crisis or stuckness, they look back along the path or journey they took, perplexed? Many people have. Maybe you have, too?

– Crisis: poor mental health, addictions, trauma or relationship breakdown, or
– Stuckness – a lack of meaning and purpose, being lost, a loss of direction or momentum in life

What we all want at in times of difficulty are simple, yet effective ideas to help us understand how we got ourselves into difficulty and how we can get ourselves out of it. Our Triangle of Possibility is one such idea.

Change – how to do it successfully (video)

Are you looking for solutions, but finding problems?

Crisis events or periods and the difficult emotions they generate such as anxiety and depression, are known to impair the very parts of our mind/body system we need to help us out in times of adversity. What this means is that we can often spend a significant period of time trying to improve difficult situations with a mind/body system actively working against us. When we first meet a client, they are often in this predicament: trying to find solutions with a mind/body system that is good at finding more problems. Einstein’s phrase neatly sums this predicament up:

‘No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.’

Self-defeating behaviours and how to overcome them

The Cave or Continuation Point is the point at which a new, positive behaviour or habit comes up against and clashes with an old, problematic behaviour or habit someone wishes to get rid of. Which behaviour or habit wins out will depend on how someone thinks, behaves, feels and forms their relationships at their Cave and Continuation Point. Will they ‘Continue‘ with the new behaviour or habit, or will they ‘Cave’ into the old one?

The Cave and Continuation Point idea allows someone to understand what factors made them vulnerable to the old behaviour or habit in the first place, and helps them to understand what they need now to overcome it.

Coaching and therapy: A Conversation With Impact (video)

No one goes into coaching or therapy expecting to come out the same as they went in. And yet for these forms of support to achieve this outcome, they need to deliver. And what they need to deliver is a Conversation With Impact. A Conversation With Impact is, simply, one that makes the difference someone is after. In our latest video, we talk about makes a Conversation With Impact and how you can have one too. If your existing conversations are not making the difference you are after, then why not get in touch? With over 15 years of experience, there is a good chance we can make the difference you are after.